Building Resilience
“Remember, the moment you accept total responsibility for everything in your life is the moment you claim the power to change anything in your life.”
Hal Elrod
Most if not all of us face challenges in life. It is our ability to deal with and overcome these challenges that can define our success in every area of life. And this is what resilience is about. It defines how we deal with the challenges we come across, how we overcome these challenges to live best life and fulfil our potential. This essentially refers to our ability to deal with stresses of life. The more resilient we are, the more flexible and adaptable we are, better our ability to deal with these stresses and bounce back.
Resilience especially refers to our ability to successfully overcome challenges, our ability to adapt, to reframe and overcome these challenges, to learn and grow stronger from these experiences. The good news is that we are all able to build our resilience. This will not happen overnight. But with time and effort we can get to the point where we will be able to successfully overcome challenges that come our ways and especially those that are unpleasant and unexpected. We will be able to navigate these setbacks and be a much better and stronger for it.
It is very important to understand that while being resilient will help us navigate through life’s challenges much easier, this does not mean that we will not experience stress and difficulties. These will happen and even the most resilient people will have to go through these dark times. But we will have the necessary tools to deal with and overcome these setbacks.
It will help if we are flexible and adaptable rather than set in our ways as to how things should work. We may not get the result in the first attempt. In fact, it could take several attempts and pivoting towards success. That’s why perseverance is an important part in building resilience.
While it is true that some people can be more resilient naturally, it is possible for all of us to build our resilience muscle. There are certain steps that you can take to build and increase your resilience ability, which include:
1. Change the narrative
2. Take responsibility
3. Practice self-compassion
4. Embrace gratitude
5. Be proactive
6. Maintain hopeful outlook
7. Identify your triggers
8. Cultivate forgiveness
9. Learn to relax and reduce stress
10. Build your self-esteem
11. Learn to be assertive
12. Develop your support circle
13. Understand and accept that change is inevitable
14. Be more optimistic
15. Nurture yourself
16. Learn to solve problems effectively
17. Find your purpose
18. Face your fears
19. Take action
20. Understand and nurture your strengths
21. Eliminate what-ifs
22. Stop negative self-talk
23. Accept yourself as you are
24. Build your self confidence
25. Stop comparing yourself to others
26. Set good daily habits
27. Set healthy boundaries
28. Maintain sense of humor
29. Embrace art and crafts
30. Embrace power of dance
31. Know the power of your physiology
32. Know the power of empowering language
33. Harness the power of positive thinking
34. Practice deep breathing
35. Have enough quality sleep
36. Write in a journal
37. Make time for reflection
38. Be flexible
39. Be disciplined
40. Volunteer
41. Do random acts of kindness
42. Manage your time
43. Stay organized
44. Embrace your vulnerability
45. Be patient
46. Prioritize your health and wellbeing
47. Embrace healthy nutrition
48. Choose to be happy
49. Dream Big, Aim High and Reach for the Stars
50. Complete anything that is incomplete
51. Focus on one thing at a time and avoid multitasking
52. Keep your agreements
53. Let go of what does not serve you
54. Trust yourself
55. Always do what you know is right
56. Harness the power of motivation
57. Build a healthy routine
58. Maintain momentum
59. Learn to manage your money
60. Be an effective communicator
61. Treat people with respect
62. Develop a morning ritual
63. Become a morning person
64. Choose a career your love
65. Courage to lead
66. Strengthen your emotional intelligence
67. Smile more
68. Declutter
69. Embrace minimalism
70. Build a growth mindset
71. Live in the moment
72. Power of focus
73. Practice mindfulness
74. Meditate
75. Take time for yourself/Prioritise yourself
76. Simplify your life
77. Seek support
78. Overcome rejection
79. Overcome fear of failure
80. Overcome limiting beliefs
81. Celebrate your achievements
82. Stop procrastination
83. Manage your time
84. Know your values
85. Harness the power of beliefs
86. Accept yourself
87. Embrace sport
88. Read an inspiring book
89. Listen to an empowering music
90. Connect with the nature
91. Take a break to recharge
92. Develop your interests and hobbies
93. Allow yourself to feel your emotions
94. Find ways to study that best suit you
Let us now examine these approaches.
Change the narrative
It is inevitable that things will not always go the way we were hoping they will. What’s more, sometimes things may go really badly and it can all be sudden and unexpected. When things do not go our way and especially when they turn out badly, there can be the tendency to wallow in our pain relieving the event over and over again and questioning why it happened in the first place. But this approach will cause even greater pain and suffering preventing us from healing, learning the lesson there is to learn and moving on. Two strategies suggested as helpful to get through are:
· Expressive Writing where we write continuously for 20 minutes about the situation and how we feel about. This will help us gain new insights and look at the problem from another more empowering angle. There is no need to produce a perfectly written story but rather to put on the paper everything that has been bothering us; our innermost thoughts about the issue. can move us forward by helping us gain new insights on the challenges in our lives.
· Finding Silver Linings is about finding some positives from a painful experience. There are two sides to each issue: negative as well as positive. Having explored all the negative aspects of the experience, we turn our attention to at least three positive things that this situation brought to us.
In other words, changing the narrative is all about reframing your thoughts especially after a traumatic event. People are faced with a lot of pressure nowadays, which can have negative consequences for your mental health if you do not address it. When an event or situation that causes negative emotions happens to us, there is a propensity to overthink it and ask questions as to why that happened to us thinking that we are the only ones that such events ever happen to. Therefore, it is so important to pause and examine our thoughts from the neutral point of view where we acknowledge what happen, take lessons, and move on.
Take responsibility
You are in charge of your destiny. You are responsible for your life, your actions and results these actions produce. Taking responsibility is to recognize the part we play, consequences of our actions owning up to it whether positive or negative result. There is no blame game. We are responsible for our own actions. A very important part of leading a happy and successful life is to accept 100% responsibility for our actions, our achievements and indeed our lives. But this is easier said than done especially as there might be circumstances where we feel very strongly that our misfortunes have been caused by the circumstances outside of our control. What this really is, is giving away our power.
The truth is that we did have the option to make a different choice, a different decision. It is nobody’s fault that we did not take the road to get to our desired outcome. We have made a decision and need to accept the outcome of that decision. It may very well be that your decision has been influenced by what you knew at the time and thought that was the best decision to take at that point. But the outcome of that decision showed that a particular decision was not the one to get you the result you were after. It is important that you are able to accept your role in getting to where you are by reviewing your steps and actions in the situation.
There is no point in regurgitating what happen and why it happened. You cannot change it now. But what you can change is how you look it. With the benefit of the hindsight, you can make more empowering decisions from now on. And you will do that knowing that you are in charge and that you will accept whatever the result in the end. The ways to do that is to:
· Stop a blame game. It can be easy and even tempting to find a reason outside of ourselves as to why something did not turn out the way we hoping it would.
· Cease complaining about what has supposedly prevented you from getting to where you want to get.
· Observe your actions and results these actions are producing and consider if there is anything you could improve next time you are facing similar issue.
· Pause and consider the role you played with your actions and thoughts that got you the outcome that you got.
Practice self-compassion
Going through tough times can makes us feel isolated and lonely. We are focused on our problems and may even think that bad things only happen to ourselves. What is worse, we could even doubt ourselves and think that there is something wrong with us. This is where self-compassion is very important. It is important to stop and recognize that other people face difficulties too. In other words, we are not alone in going through pain and suffering. Indeed, others might be facing even darker times. To express self-compassion, we need to show kindness to ourselves as we deal with the upheavals in our lives. The strategies to help us feel greater self-compassion are:
· Mindful Self-Compassion, which proved helpful in one study as the participants in the 8-week program employed mindfulness that led to the decreased depression, anxiety, and stress.
· Self-Compassion Break which comprises three steps and can be taken anytime you feel overwhelmed by pain and suffering. It comprises the following three steps:
1. Being mindful where you observe how you feel without a judgement and acknowledge the suffering and pain it is causing you.
2. Understanding that you are not alone as others also go through similar or even totally situations and experience the same if not a greater pain and suffering. It is important to acknowledge that other people suffer and feel the same way as they go through their own setbacks and upheavals.
3. Being kind to yourself as you take time to be with yourself, accept where you are and have patience that you will get to through this.
It is important to understand that self-compassion can lead to better health outcomes, including lower levels of stress and anxiety. To show self-compassion is to recognize how we feel especially when going through tough times and stop berating yourself but be kind to yourself, have patience and allow yourself to fully process what is going on.
Embrace gratitude
There is a lot to be grateful for if we pause and look around us. Even when we think there is hardly anything to be grateful for, there is sure something that we can count as a blessing. Being grateful for what we have will help us feel happier, lead to improved health outcomes, and help us face challenges in an empowering way. To be grateful is to appreciate what we have and where we are in life. It does not have to be anything major. In fact, it can be something as small as being thankful for a beautiful sunny day. It is helpful to be consistent. So, make an effort and find three things you can be grateful for each and every day. Start and end your day with a grateful heart and see how it impacts your overall wellbeing and bring even more to be grateful for.
Be proactive
It is important to be proactive by taking the necessary steps to get to our destination. This means that we plan the journey, anticipate, and address potential obstacles to make sure that we arrive to our destination. Being proactive means taking control and being in charge of what happen and how we go about it rather than being a passive observer watching things happen and having to solve problems that have not been anticipated. There may be more than one way to get to our destination. Being proactive can also involve having different plans to obtain a desired result. This is also about being flexible and adapting our approach, making the necessary tweaks and effectively solving problems from the empowered state of mind.
Maintain hopeful outlook
Hope is an important ingredient of success. It is what helps us dream and believe that we can achieve something better. Having a healthy dose of hope is very important for our overall wellbeing and dealing with challenges and upheavals that may happen along the way. But more importantly having hope will give us fuel to keep going and striving for something better for ourselves and our world.
Hope can sometimes be confused for optimism. The two while somewhat similar are also different. The more optimistic we are, the more hopeful we are. The opposite is also true in that less optimistic we are, the less hopeful we will be. When we have hope, we generally believe in a specific positive outcome for our lives.
Hope comprises thoughts and emotions and more importantly it is a skill that can be developed and honed over time. When we have hope we are able to acknowledge difficulties we experience; we understand that we are not where we want to be. But whilst not where we want to be, we believe and feel positive emotions that we will be able to successfully overcome difficulties and get to the other side.
Identify your triggers
Knowing the triggers that cause your stress and anxiety is an important step in building your resilience. More often than not, we may not be able to avoid these situations that trigger us. But knowing these triggers and how to deal with them will help us overcome any challenges. There will be things we can control. But there will also be things that are outside of our control. We can only influence what we can control. For that reason, part of our strategy in addressing the triggers is to accept what we cannot control and take steps about what we can control.
Cultivate forgiveness
It is never helpful to hold a grudge. Sure, bad things happen. But we need to accept that we are not able to change what happen. What we can control is how we think about it now. Cultivating forgiveness is a way to free yourself from the chains of past that has been holding your stuck. To forgive is to consciously choose to let go of the past hurt and free ourselves from the resentment and anger that we feel as a result. This does not mean that we are condoning what happen or excusing those that hurt us. We accept that we cannot change what happened and decide that it is in our best interests to let go and move on with our life.
An important step in this process is to forgive yourself first. Then forgive everyone else involved. This will likely stir up painful memories and bring to the surface deep suffering. It is important to allow yourself to feel these emotions. There is no need to make up with the person that hurt you. But this process will free you and bring you an inner peace so you can move on with your life. This will also have a positive impact on your mental and physical wellbeing as you are no longer consumed by these deep-seated painful memories and emotions. This can be a very confronting process to go through. But you can write about it and let your forgiveness be expressed on the paper if it is difficult to talk to someone.
Learn to relax and reduce stress
It is mostly thinking about the past that is causing us pain and suffering as we relieve painful experiences and question what went wrong. But in the process of doing this, our stress and anxiety raise. It is important to take a break and focus on the present moment. Past is gone. We cannot change what happen. But we take lessons, reframe it in a positive light and move on.
One of the ways to be more present in the now is to practice mindfulness, which offers effective tools to deal with our feelings and move us towards empowerment rather than despair.
Build your self-esteem
To understand self-esteem is to understand what we think of ourselves. It is our opinion of ourselves. Having a healthy dose of self-esteem is to help us feel more positive and believe in ourselves. In turn, we will also be better equipped to deal with life’s challenges that might come our way. We will be able to tackle these challenges big and small head without delay. On the other hand, having a low self-esteem will inhibit our ability to successfully deal with the challenges leaving us feeling negative about ourselves and our capacity to create life of our dreams. We could even be tempted to avoid tacking challenges, which could feel enticing at first but in the long run could seriously inhibit our ability to realise our potential and go after our dreams. In more serious instances it can negatively impact our health and cause stress, anxiety and even depression.
The good news is that you can build your self-esteem over time. As a first step, you will need to identify negative beliefs about yourself and replace them with the more empowering alternative. If it helps, you can list these negative beliefs in your journal and next to them list evidence of success that dispels these negative beliefs. You can keep adding positive beliefs backed by the evidence when you successfully achieved something that you consider important no matter how big or small. In the future, remember every time you succeed, you do something that turns out well as evidence to back yourself because you can do many great things.
Learn to be assertive
Being assertive is to stand up for yourself and make your wishes known. It is also about respecting other people's opinions and needs. But you will settle for nothing less than other people respecting your opinions and needs. This can be tricky for some people especially if they are not used to making their needs known and not feel free to express their opinions. But at the same time, this can also prove to be risky as standing up for ourselves, we can lose some relationships where people were not treating us the way we deserve to be treated. It is being honest with yourself and others. After all, you don’t need people in your life that do not respect you; that don’t have your back.
You may be tempted to say yes to people just so you can keep them in your life. But this could come at cost as you experience stream of negative emotions having to put up with mistreatment and disrespect. It can be hard at first. But you can start with small steps to command a greater respect. And with practice it will get easier and for is best, people will get the message and will start treating you better.
Develop your support circle
It is important to surround yourself with people that you can count on to support you in your time of need. Being surrounded by the people that have your best interest at heart has positive health benefits. Our relationships with other people are one of our core needs and include not just our family but also our friends and peers. But our support networks can change over time as our life change and we can have people leaving and joining at certain points. In some instances, we may have the same people with us all our lives. But for the most part there will be different people at different points of our lives. It is important to build our support network by understanding where we are and who we have to support our particular need and then add new people in the areas of need.
Understand and accept that change is inevitable
There is one thing for sure and that is change. Change is inevitable and no matter how hard we can seek to run away from it, it is here to stay and our best strategy is to learn how to harness its benefits to position ourselves well to succeed. Change can be scary and nerve wrecking as we think how best to navigate through the unknown. The most anxiety appears to come from the fact that change comes with so much unknown and uncertainty. It can feel like we have lost control over our destiny. There is no point in stressing about change or running away from it. What is helpful is to accept where we are and control what we can control. And what we can control in these instances is mostly how we feel and react. Almost everything else will likely be outside of our control. If it helps, write down different options that you think might be available ensuring that you address best as well as worst case scenario. From this you can decide what your next steps will be. This way you will be in control rather than allowing the process to dictate your steps. Sometimes it could also help to reflect on the time when you successfully overcome similar situation and consider how you dealt with it back then. You can implement what worked back then to now and also have a benefit of the hindsight to perhaps take different steps as well.
Be more optimistic
Being optimistic will help us to deal with the challenges with a high degree of beliefs in our ability to overcome whatever may be thrown at us. This will not only help us feel happier and more successful, able and willing to follow our dreams but also boost our health. We can all learn to be more optimistic. It is not something that some people have while others don’t. Being optimistic also means that we view problems as temporary and surmountable rather than permanent and insurmountable.
Nurture yourself
Nurturing yourself is an important step on your wellbeing journey. Prioritizing your self-care to nourish your body will have not just physical but also mental health benefits as you feel more rested, relaxed and having the energy to follow your dreams. You can do anything that brings you peace, rest, and relaxation. It is one activity that you implement daily like walking in your local park or having a quite time on your own.
Learn to solve problems effectively
Being able to solve problems quickly and effectively will free your energy to focus on other pursuits. A problem can have more than one way to solve it. We need to think of the way that will enable us to solve it in the most effective way with least effort but yield the same result. When we are able to solve problems, we will feel more confident and believe in our ability to overcome obstacles that are inevitable. Again, it is important to focus on what we can control and frame our solution around it. It may be helpful to write down different solutions and steps how to get there.
Find your purpose
Our purpose is why we want to do what we do. It is not necessary one goal. But it is over encompassing sense that there is something bigger, some more important reason as to why we have chosen to what we do. Finding purpose in life not something that everyone has been able to successfully discover. But it is what most of us would like to attain sooner rather than later. Our purpose is very personal and specific to us. What is important to us may not be important to someone else. It is our purpose that can propel us towards our dreams even in hardest of times. In essence it is our roadmap and sense of direction leading to a fulfilled life. This is why discovering your purpose in life is very important. It may even lead to a greater satisfaction and success in all areas of your life.
Your purpose is closely related to your talents and interests. The talents and interests that you have are unique to you. You will recognize your purpose as it will be something you enjoy doing, something that makes you happy and energized. Using your purpose, you not only help yourself, but more importantly share you gifts with others and make the world better place.
Develop a compelling vision
By creating your vision, you are mapping out your destination. It is what you want to achieve; your dreams big and small. This has proven to be one of the most effective strategies for achieving the life of your dreams. Your vision will serve as a guidance system to lead you towards your dreams. Think about where you want to be in the future and how you want your life to look like. In fact, think of different areas of your life and what you want them to look like, what you want to achieve and how you want to feel. A clear vision of what the future looks like will propel you closer to your dreams as you know where to go. Having a vision is akin to knowing your destination so you can arrive there. You vision is long term and short term. In the long term you want your life to look a particular way. But in the short term you have goals to accomplish that will bring you closer to your dreams. It is helpful to put your vision on the paper and to even create a collage that represents your vision. Our life become more meaningful too as we move in the direction of our dreams and bring our vision to reality.
Face your fears
This is easier said than done. But this is an essential step in moving on and realizing your full potential. It is important to approach this in a way where you face your fears gradually one small step at a time. If you have a fear of public speaking to your school assembly, you can start of by speaking to you family, your close friends, your class and build on it over time. If you do this consistently, you will soon enough be able to give a speech to your school assembly. There is no point of hiding from your fears. The only way you will get to the other side is if you confront them head on even if it needs to be in small doses to start off.
Take action
The final and perhaps the most important ingredient on the resilience journey is to take action. While we may know the best strategies and have the best tools, the only way we can get the result is if we start taking action. It is important to take the first step no matter how big or small. However, it is not always easy to take action especially as we have been through times and may worry if our actions will plunge us farther away from where we want to be rather that to get us closer to our desired result. That why it is helpful to take small steps and as we complete one task, we can move on the next one and so on and so forth until we get what we set out to do. We will never be perfectly positioned with all the knowledge and experience we need. That’s why it is important to start and allow the journey to take you in the direction where you will learn and grow. This may mean that our actions will need to be tweaked and sometimes even taking a different turn as the next logical step reveals itself. The ways to start doing the things include the following:
Ø Stop overthinking
Ø Stop waiting until everything is perfect
Ø Make a plan
Ø Take action continuously
Understand and nurture your strengths
Understanding our strengths will help us better understand how we naturally drawn to and do it with ease. More importantly we are able to devote time and effort to nurture our strengths and excel in our pursuits. We will be able to learn and grow and will naturally increase our confidence. It will also help us narrow down the career options that best suit us. While knowing your strengths is important, it is equally important to know your weaknesses so you can improve in these areas or perhaps not pursuing careers requiring these skills.
Eliminate what-ifs
There are times when we all ruminate about what ifs as we review different scenarios. While this can be helpful when we need to make decision and select between different options, more often than not this can also compound anxiety and paralyze our decision making as we begin questioning even simple details. It is hard if not impossible to know the answer to every single question and if we overthink and question even the smallest detail, anxiety and worry may to go up due to the lack of certainty to know the outcome.
That’s why it is important to address these questions immediately as they appear so we can stop this spinning wheel of endless questioning. We need to be able to decide if we are going to go with the steps or stop the process as there may be legitimate reasons for not proceeding. Rather than thinking of what might go wrong, list all the steps and actions that you can do to address any potential issues that you could anticipate. Also, if you write down different scenarios including the best- and worst-case scenarios, write down the action steps that you are going to take to address any potential issues that might eventuate.
Stop negative self-talk
Self-talk is the naturally part of our lives as different thoughts swirl in our minds. This can be helpful when these thoughts are empowering. But it can have negative consequences if these thoughts are disempowering. There are ways to stop unhelpful thinking by becoming aware of our thoughts and then think of a positive antidote to that thought.
While negative self-talk is a natural part of the human experience, there are ways to disrupt patterns of unhelpful thinking with a few strategies to challenge your inner critic. Practicing positive self-talk by expressing gratitude for what you have not matter how small and insignificant you think it is, is one of the strategies to neutralize and even overcome a negative self-talk.
Accept yourself as you are
It is important to accept ourselves as we are where we are aware of our personal traits both positive and negative and can work on improving these areas that we think need to be improved. Lack of self-acceptance will lead to loss of confidence and will hold us from reaching our full potential. But being aware of our perceived shortcomings, we can make a conscious effort to work on improving them. On the other hand, we should acknowledge our positive traits, nurture them and acknowledge our achievements.
Build your self confidence
Confidence is very important for our personal growth and development as it helps us dream big and move in the direction of these dreams. On the contrary, when our confidence is low, we are less likely to move forward boldly towards our dreams. more importantly, this can lead to more serious problems and inhibit our ability to live our lives fully and address challenges effectively. Focusing on our achievements and setting SMART goals and working to address challenges that may present will be helpful.
Stop comparing yourself to others
It is not helpful to compare ourselves to others especially in the age of social media when so much we see is not real and yet we are left to believe that this is something we should aspire to. However, by having a positive role model to inspire us can help us on our journey of becoming better in what we do and becoming a better person. Even more helpful is to compare ourselves to our younger self and see how much we have learnt and grown. We never stop learning and growing and if our focus remains of improving and being a better person, this process will be empowering.
Set good daily habits
Implementing healthy habits is helpful to live successful lives. Everyone can have good and bad habits. The important thing is that bad habits can be replaced by the positive ones. But the process is not as simple as it seems although it can be achieved with a bit of effort. The main point is to establish regular habits that point you in the right direction. Habits play an integral part in your life so much so that an individual is viewed as a sum of their habit and this will determine success in life. Habits are something we do every day. It does not have to be anything major and can be something very simple. But whatever they are, they will determine your success in life.
Set healthy boundaries
A boundary is that invisible line that defines what we deem to be acceptable behaviour towards ourselves. This is in effect a clear guideline of how we want to be treated and how we will respond if these boundaries are crossed. Personal boundaries are essential to healthy and successful life as without them we would lose a sense of security and safety and even lead to the feelings of anger and hurt. To set boundaries we need to understand that we deserve to be safe and respected and then communicate these boundaries to others.
Maintain sense of humor
Having a sense of humor is important for our health. It will help us deal with the negative experiences especially if we are able to think of them in a way that is funny as these will be less likely to trigger us and hold us back from living our best life than it would otherwise would have been the case.
Embrace art and crafts
In order to relax and stop focusing on negative experiences, it is helpful to purse creative interests such as arts and craft. This will also help gain new skills along with reducing stress and anxiety.
Embrace power of dance
Dance like sport will help people improve physical health, gain new skills, build self-confidence and also increase our capacity to process painful emotions.
Know the power of your physiology
Physiology is essentially our body and how it functions. It also affects how we feel. For example, standing straight will lead to feeling positive about yourself while being slumped will likely lead to negative feelings. It is essential to be aware of our posture and then make the necessary adjustment to feel better and change our emotional state.
Know the power of empowering language
How we talk and the words we use are more important than might seem. It is important to talk empowering and encouraging words to ourselves to propel us towards success. The opposite is also true in that using disempowering language will have negative impact on our success.
Harness the power of positive thinking
When we think positive thoughts, we are more likely to have confidence that we are able to get through potential obstacles to reach our dreams and live our best life. While this does not guarantee that there will not be difficult times ahead, this does mean that we will be able to see ourselves capable of overcoming challenges and seeing the best in each situation. This is not denying difficulties but rather taking the lessons and focusing on the positives.
Practice deep breathing
The importance of a deep breathing cannot be underestimated. After all, we breathe to live. Taking a few deep breaths each day will help alleviate stress and promote an increased relaxation. It will also lead to an increased focus and will have calming effect.
Have enough quality sleep
We need to sleep to recharge and refresh so we are ready for the new day. Having a sufficient and quality sleep each night aside for ensuring we are ready to tackle new challenges in the morning, will also lead to improved health outcomes.
Write in a journal
It is helpful to keep a journal on a regular basis to document our feelings and anything else need greater clarity about. This can include how to solve problems and how to deal with our fears. You do not have to have a structure about your writing and can write anything you want to write if that is what helps you relax more. This is a good way to get to know yourself on a deeper level.
Make time for reflection
Being able to reflect on your past is very important tool to help you learn and grow as you evaluate and review the process to see what worked well and what can be improved next time.
Be flexible
Being flexible to adapt quickly and easily when change comes in. This will enable us to take advantage of the opportunities as they present, learn and grow along the way.
Be disciplined
Having a discipline means that we are able to follow the rules we have in our lives. It is very important part of living a happy and successful life. This means that we are more likely to do what needs to be done even if it feels difficult to do right now knowing we will be step closer to achieving our dreams.
Volunteer
Taking up volunteering to support causes important to you has many benefits. Firstly, it is great feeling knowing that your effort made a difference for those in need. You will also meet new people, learn valuable skills that will help you in other areas of your life and gain more confidence.
Do random acts of kindness
Acts of kindness can seem small and insignificant. But they can make a big and positive difference. This can be something as small as letting someone go before you in the queue or taking a time to help neighbor. You will feel sense of achievement and satisfaction knowing that you helped someone while this will also have a positive impact on the person you helped as well.
Manage your time
It is important to have a good time management skill so we can plan and achieve our dreams but also lead a balanced life. This will have positive impacts on your health and wellbeing knowing that you are in charge of your schedule and that you have confidence that all tasks that need to be done will be done.
Stay organized
Being well organized is a very important part of your success and wellbeing. It will also enable you to make an informed decision and solve problems more effectively.
Embrace your vulnerability
Vulnerability is hard to explain. It can best be described as when we are ready to share our deepest feelings without knowing if we will receive favourable response. But while this might be viewed as a sign of weakness, this can actually be one of the strengths. Being vulnerable is to be who we really are knowing there is a risk that this may not work in our favour. But we do it knowing that this is our authentic self. It takes a lot of courage to be our authentic self.
Be patient
In today’s fast paced world, we are accustomed to expect immediate results. There is less patience to work towards the result over a period of time especially when there is an uncertainty. But this could be beneficial in the long run as you make more informed decision without need to rush where you may not have all the necessary information or time to properly consider your options. To be patient involves more focusing on the long term rather than the short-term vision and then taking the necessary steps in the orderly fashion without need for hastily made decisions. We do not see instant results. But we can see bigger picture knowing that our actions are getting us closer to our bringing that vision to reality.
Prioritize your health and wellbeing
Living a healthy lifestyle will lead to improved physical and mental health outcomes. But this is a decision that needs to be made to look after your health and wellbeing. Taking steps to enhance your health and wellbeing on a regular basis is an important part of a daily routine.
Embrace healthy nutrition
A healthy diet is essential for your health and wellbeing. The benefits are far and wide and extend to not only physical health but also mental health.
Choose to be happy
Happiness brings positive emotions and is also beneficial for our physical and mental health. It is unrealistic to expect that someone will be happy all of the time. But even in difficult times, happy people are able to focus on good things and expect that they will get through.
Dream Big, Aim High and Reach for the Stars
When we dream big, we aim something bigger than ourselves that we strive to attain. This gives us motivation to keep going and get closer to our destination. We focus on the vision we have for our life that will stretch us and even empower us to keep going towards what it is that we dream of. In essence we are directing our own movie and decide in which direction we will go and we step through on our journey.
Complete anything that is incomplete
If there is something that you know needs to be done but is not done, this will have a negative impact on your success and happiness. You will likely to dread of having to eventually do it and possibly even worry if you are not doing it in timely manner. We all have those tasks that are not the most enjoyable to do. But it is best to do it as soon as it needs to be done to free us to focus on what really matters to us.
Focus on one thing at a time and avoid multitasking
It can be tempting to multitask and seek to achieve more. Whilst this might seem a good idea, it is not very helpful to get us to where we need to go. Having to focus on more than one thing at a time may lead to less than perfect results, make you less productive and even cause us stress.
Keep your agreements
It is important that we do what we say will we do and to do it in a timely manner and at the acceptable standard. This applies equally to the small and insignificant task as much as to those bigger and more significant tasks. But more importantly this will build your credibility, trust and accountability. It also demonstrates our standards by which we live. When we uphold high standards and keep our word, we gain respect and other people are able to trust and rely on us.
Let go of what does not serve you
It is important to understand what does not serve us. This may change from time to time, which is why it is important to take stock regularly and see what does not serve us anymore, which can include relationships, activities, and possessions.
When we let go of something that no longer serve us, we create opportunity for something new to come in. We are constantly growing and evolving. But to grow and fulfil our potential we need to be able to understand what serves us and what does not serve us and take the necessary action to free ourselves from what does not serve us. It is not easy to let go. It takes a lot of courage to do that. But when we do, we will get the opportunity to get our life to another level.
Trust yourself
Being able to trust yourself is one of the fundamentals of our success and happiness. To trust yourself is to have faith that you can do what you need to do. Having trust in ourselves will give us the necessary clarity for our life and courage to pursue the path to get there. But it is easier said than done as doubt can creep in causing us to second guess our instincts and relieve negative experiences from the past thinking that we cannot go forward and get success. It is important to trust our intuition and follow an inner guidance that we all have. This can start in smaller steps to help us build confidence to trust ourselves and increase gradually as we have evidence that this is working in our lives.
Always do what you know is right
Always do what you know is right no matter what the circumstances. We are all leading busy lives and it can be tempting to sometimes cut corners. But instead, we should aim to ensure that we do what needs to be done at the standard that it needs to be done at. We will have peace of mind knowing that we did our best and we did what is right.
Harness the power of motivation
We need motivation to keep going even in the toughest of times as we focus on bigger picture and our vision. It is like believing that you will find the way even if you don’t see how, you will be able to overcome obstacles in front of you. There is something bigger and more important that motivation drives us towards. When we are not motivated it is very hard for us to take the necessary action and even if we take action, we may not be as productive or effective that would normally be when we are motivated.
Build a healthy routine
Having a routine gives us a sense of direction and structure as we tick activities on our list. It does not have to be anything very strict but something that you designed to align with your vision and what you want to achieve in life. We feel like we are in control, having greater focus, better organized and higher productivity we know what needs to be done and when we tick those activities form our list, we will feel sense of accomplishment.
Maintain momentum
Momentum is when we keep going and take actions consistently. We continue on our journey to bring our vision and our dreams to reality. But more importantly it all feels effortless and there are logical steps that we take that deliver results to us.
Learn to manage your money
Learning to manage your money will help you be happier and more successful. You will be able to achieve your dreams and have an inner peace knowing that you are financially stable.
Be an effective communicator
Learning to communicate effectively will lead to improved relationships both personal and business. But to communicate well, it is necessary to be a good listener where we pay close attention to what others are saying and clarify ambiguities by rephrasing their questions for greater understanding.
Treat people with respect
It is important to respect others in our dealings with them. It involves more than politeness as we accept people as they are. Treating others as we expect to be treated in return is a starting point and it is more likely the same treatment will be afforded to us in return.
Develop a morning ritual
Having a morning ritual does not necessarily mean that you need to be a morning person. But being a morning person will definitely help. Developing and practicing a morning routine that works for us will go a long way to help us during the day as we go about our business. We will be more focused to devote time for what is important to us and closer towards our vision by tacking the goals we have set.
Become a morning person
Becoming a morning person has its benefits as it will not only enable you to accomplish more but also help improve your focus and overall health and wellbeing as you will have structure and healthy habits.
Choose a career your love
It is important to identify your interests and talents and align your career with those that will provide a foundation for enjoying what you do. You will enjoy doing the work and it will not even feel like a work but rather something you can make a positive contribution along the way. This will go a long way to help you have a happy and successful life.
Courage to lead
When you lead you have the power to bring about positive change. It takes courage to take a leading role. You will also learn valuable skills like responsibility for your action and results you produce. But you will also gain trust from others and instill confidence to help you bring your vision to reality.
Strengthen your emotional intelligence
Emotional intelligence is very important as it gives us the necessary skills to go through life and get through obstacles on our way in an empowering way. Not only are we able to understand our emotions, but we are able to harness the power of our emotions on our journey. We are able to make decisions in a way where we focus on what is important and are not negatively impacted by our emotions that may stand in the way. The good news is that we are able to develop emotional intelligence with practice.
Smile more
Smiling changes, the way we feel. We feel happy when we smile. This is one of the easiest ways to change how we feel.
Declutter
To declutter is to get rid of things that we do not need. This is mainly getting rid of physical things. But it can also include non-physical things like disempowering feelings and habits that do not serve us. It will give us more space, freedom and clarity and improve our health and wellbeing. We will be better organized and have an improved sense of direction of knowing what is important to us.
Embrace minimalism
To embrace minimalism means that we are only interested to have those things that we really need and that support us in the pursuit of living our best life. This does not have to be dramatic purge of stuff from our life. But it does mean that we will consciously decide to only have those things that support us and what we what to do in life. There is no need to accumulate things. This will benefit us financially. But it will also have benefits for our health and wellbeing. It is important to understand that minimalism and decluttering are not the same. Declutter is the first step towards becoming minimalist. But just decluttering does not mean that you will be or need to be minimalist.
Build a growth mindset
Having a growth mindset is essential for successful and happy life as we understand that we can learn and grow to achieve our dreams. We also believe in our own capabilities to achieve our dreams and will take the necessary steps to learn what needs to be learnt so we can achieve our dreams. with growth mindset we are able to accept failure and learn from it and move on from it in an empowered way.
Live in the moment
The present moment is all we have. It is the only time we can do something about like feeling happy. But the problem is when we are distracted by the excessive focus on past or future. Excessive focus on past will bring up painful memories while focusing on future may being feelings of worry and anxiety as there is so much uncertainty and unknown.
Power of focus
Focus is important so we go in the direction where we need to go. When we focus, we are able to be more effective and more productive. When we are focused, we are able to better solve problems as we see the new ways to do things and the opportunities that are presented and know what needs to be done to achieve what you need to do.
Practice mindfulness
To be mindful is to focus on present moment. We are just simply being without judgement or distractions. If we are having a meal, that is what we are focused on. We are living in the moment. There is no need to be thinking of past or future. You are just observing what is happening in this current moment.
Meditate
To meditate is to take time to be with ourselves in quiet time. We stop and just notice our throughs and we are basically experiencing being with ourselves. This will bring us inner peace and reduce stress.
Take time for yourself/Prioritise yourself
While it is important to help others, it is even more important to look after ourselves. We have our dreams that we want to achieve and we will be able to do that if we focus on ourselves. You cannot give to others if you are not looking after yourself so that you are in the position to help. It is not possible to give if you are running on empty.
Simplify your life
Simple life means we focus on what matters. There are so many distractions around us. This means focusing on what is important. we will be better equipped to go after our dreams and live our best life.
Seek support
It is important to seek help when we need it. There are times when help from others will be what we need. It could be professionals like counsellor or coach or even family and friends. Asking for help is a sign of help that we need support and understand where that support is needed to get through what we are going through at the moment.
Overcome rejection
It is difficult to experience rejection as we feel we have lost something that we had or wanted to have where we question our self-worth. While this is undoubtably painful, in the end it could turn out to be a blessing in disguise that will get you to your dream life.
Overcome fear of failure
When we have fear of failure, this will stop us from taking the necessary steps to achieve our dreams. But failure is almost inevitable on the journey towards success as we work out the best ways to do something. Each time something does not work the way we were hoping it would work, we learn something new that we can implement the next time to improve our results.
Overcome limiting beliefs
Liming beliefs will stop us and prevent us from living our best life. We stay in our comfort zone afraid to take a leap of faith and go after our dreams. The good news is that these limiting beliefs can be changed and replaced with the empowering beliefs that serve us. Limiting beliefs are often subconscious where we do not even know that we have them. We do not take action as we don’t think we will succeed and we stay in our comfort zone without reaching our full potential. In other words, there are risks and there is uncertainty and we are not prepared to take action as there is no guarantee of success. To be able to overcome limiting beliefs we need to be aware that we have them and replace them with the empowering belief and to challenge them looking back at the results we were able to achieve despite our fears.
Celebrate your achievements
It is important to recognize our achievements both big and small. We work hard, we have taken action and we succeed. It is important to stop and celebrate what we were able to achieve. This is not like rewarding yourself. You are simply acknowledging your success and patting yourself on the back. To reward is to achieve the end result. But to celebrate is to acknowledge successfully completed steps on the journey to our end result.
Stop procrastination
Procrastination stops us from living our best life as we don’t take the necessary actions when they need to be taken to get us towards our dreams. Being able to overcome procrastination is essential steps in living happy and successful lives. We will be able to empower ourselves, gain confidence, learn and grow. But if we are unable to get through, this can have serious negative consequences. Doing the activities in smaller steps rather than tacking one big goal might help.
Manage your time
Having a good time management skill will enable you to accomplish more within a specified period of time. You will be able to lead much more balance life and have sufficient time for all activities that you need to do including your career and life.
Know your values
Understanding our values is important as we will be in sync with who we really are at our core and able to make decisions and take the necessary actions to get us closer to our dreams. In effect knowing our values is like having a compass to guide us through life.
Harness the power of beliefs
Our beliefs are important part our success. We will be able to take necessary action based on our beliefs. Our beliefs have immense power. But sometimes they can negatively affect us and prevent us from achieving level of success that we otherwise would achieve. These are limiting beliefs. It is important to understand what our limiting beliefs are and take action to replace them with the empowering beliefs.
Accept yourself
Accepting ourselves is an important step in leading a healthy and successful life. In today age of social media where there are unrealistic expectations and promoting unrealistic standards, the problem is compounded. We all have parts of ourselves that we happily accept as well as those that we are not comfortable with. The most important step is to know that we are as we are and be grateful that the way we are enables us to do and achieve many different things. In other words, we count our blessing as we are able to do what we need to do. Nobody is perfect. Social media does not represent reality in many instances. This is what is important to understand.
Embrace sport
Playing sport regularly is very helpful. Benefit is both physical and mental health improvements including improved fitness, reduced stress, greater energy and feeling happier.
Read an inspiring book
Reading books is beneficial for our overall health and wellbeing. It will stimulate your mental activity keeping your brain active so it can retain its power and capacity. We will also gain a new knowledge about various topics but will also enrich our vocabulary.
Listen to an empowering music
Power of music on our wellbeing cannot be underestimated. Music can quickly change our emotional state and increase feeling of positive emotions and decrease stress and anxiety.
Connect with the nature
Spending time in nature has a relaxing effect as it provides more clam and peace leading to better health and wellbeing outcomes. This can be something simple as walking in your local park and cultivating your garden.
Take a break to recharge
We should schedule regular breaks in our schedule. In today’s busy and fast paced world, taking break to recharge and rest has become a necessity so we can relieve stress and improve our focus. This will give us boost our energy and increase our productivity.
Develop your interests and hobbies
Developing interests and hobbies are an important part of leading a balanced and happy life. As you do something that you enjoy, there will be other benefits including being more relaxed and learning new skills. This is something that brings us joy but also contributed to a more fulfilled life. You can embark on something totally new or you can just follow what you enjoy doing. This will provide greater relaxation and also give you new knowledge and skills.
Allow yourself to feel your emotions
We feel range of emotions. It is important that we allow ourselves to feel our emotions both positive and negative. It is not possible to always feel happy and it is not possible to always feel sad. We can feel empowering and disempowering emotions. This will ensure that we are aware of our feelings, gain a better understanding of the situation and take steps to overcome disempowering emotions rather than to continue suffering.
Find ways to study that best suit you
Finding the study method that suits your learning style is imperative to ensure you succeed and thrive in your academic pursuits. While these study methods may vary from subject to subject, they will also vary from person from person. Over the past few years remote learning has grown in prominence and at times was the only way to study. Improving your study skills that underpin your learning will lead to improved academic outcomes.
You can do it. One step at a time and you will get there. But you have to take that first step.